Tribute to Allison — by Robert Skinner
June 29, 2019
Tribute to Allison
I am sure Allison is looking down right now and wondering, “you fill in the expletives” could someone who completely dislikes the Baltimore Ravens and Washington Capitals, be involved in a service to honor me.
I first heard about and met Allison, known at the time as Muffy, when she was a high school senior. One of my closest personal friends, Will Armistead, was the admissions counselor and there was no doubt that she was one of his favorite recruits. She was smart, sassy, and really liked sports and because her classes were in the Rockefeller Center– an immediate bond was established between us, since I was the Voice of Bobcats. I was also the IFC Advisor and when she pledged Alpha Delta Pi, our paths frequently crossed. I followed her career to Baltimore and was so happy she decided to return to Wesleyan where we again shared our love of Bobcat sports and of our beloved alma mater. I respected her passion and advocacy for students immensely and always appreciated the kindness she always showed my two sons.
The poet Amanda Bradley writes,
“Those we love are never really lost to us—we feel them in so many ways-through friends they always cared about and dreams they left behind, in beauty that they added to our days…in words of wisdom we still carry with us and memories that never will be gone…Those we love are never really lost to us—For everywhere their special love lives on.
Over the past few days, I have read countless tributes about Allison. There are so many similar themes that emerge…passionate advocate, driven and conscientious, an incredible mentor, someone you could talk to about anything, true friend, and someone who had the ability to disagree with your belief or stance with intensity, but never showed disrespect and was still your friend after the debate.
I thought I would share a few with you from Wesleyan colleagues, students, and friends.
From Luke Huggins, a Biology Department faculty colleague…
“Al always had a new idea to help students.
We knew all the triumphs of her nieces and we loved watching them grow up.
You always knew what was going on with the Capitals even if you didn’t like hockey.
I don’t know anyone who spent more time tutoring students. It was hard for her to get any work done because there was always a student in the office at her table working with her.
You always knew that if you walked into her office, there would be snacks, chocolate, coffee, and a receptive audience for your complaints.
She was the conscience of the department. If you were sliding off track, she would let you know.
She wanted to be the Faculty Athletic rep forever. She bled orange and black. She would be bundled up in her Wesleyan overcoat freezing for them for one season and roasting in the stand the next.
Pi for Die!
She loved the Capitals so much, she invented a daughter just to get a free swag.”
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From Allison Whitehair, the Director of the Student Success Center
I did an email search in my inbox for emails from Allison. There were 1,594. About 90% were work related, the other 10% were Allison Gems. They were funny stories, or cute shoes she either wanted or thought I should have, or a request for coffee. There were also many emails titled “Obnoxious Auntie Email.” And within those emails was always incredible pride over the accomplishments of one or her nieces. I never met them, but I feel like I have been following their lives for eight years because they were Allison’s world and she was so darn proud of them. Allison was a star of a teacher—a real star. She was so incredible with our students. And I think it’s because she was driven to help our students in the same way that she wanted her nieces to experience life. She looked at everything through their lens. It’s a lens that we should all adopt because boy, did it serve Allison, and Wesleyan well.
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Thanks to Dr. James Moore and Dr. Pam Wovchko, I am also able to share some more recent comments from Allison’s teaching evaluations.
“Professor Hull is an engaging and understanding professor who truly puts her students first. I felt that I could go to her any time for anything. Her sense of humor makes rather boring topics interesting and memorable.”
“She is a wonderful and positive person that makes me want to come to class everyday just to see what fun things she had to say. One of my all-time favorite professors.”
“Professor Hull is my absolute favorite woman on the planet. She is so wonderful and caring. She teaches so well and make sure every student understands the topic before moving on. She has such a kind heart and makes every class with her such a great time. Who knew someone could make an anatomy class and lab fun. Allison can. She is just fabulous.”
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And from Facebook….”When I began having an existential crisis about what I wanted to do with my life, Allison was the first person I went so see. After numerous breakdowns, and hockey arguments in her office, she helped me plan my future. Wednesday was my Physician Assistant’s school orientation and I would have never gotten here if it wasn’t for one of the greatest mentors in my life. You may be gone, but your lessons will continue to help me through the rest of my life.” Dylan Ringer.
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“If you knew Allison, you knew the moment you saw her she would brighten your day no matter what you were feeling that day. Whether you were walking into her office to vent about life, asking for guidance, laughing at stupid stuff, or to talk about life, she was always there. I know she touched many lives and the memories we all share with her will be cherished forever. Kelsie Lusk
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“I met Allison on my first day of freshman year. She began as my professor but quickly became my mentor and friend. It is because of her that I chose to pursue physical therapy. Allison was one of the most amazing people I ever met. I will miss having drinks at Stone Tower and being able to talk forever about anything. Thank you times a million, Allison.” Jaiden Harvey
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“Allison always put a question on our anatomy exams that read: “every day is a great day to be a ____________.” And every class she said that every day is a great day to be a Bobcat. She so loved being a Bobcat and did everything for her students. She was there when Wesleyan won the Super Regionals and when Wesleyan made it to the Softball World Series. She cheered for us more than any person in the stands.” Taylor Barnett
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“May you forever be in our hearts, Big Al. You were a wonderful mentor in science and in life. You held me up when I was down, pushed me beyond what I thought was possible, and taught me how to be a decent human. It has been ten years since you were my professor, yet you have not stopped teaming me. You taught me to far nothing and never let anyone get in the way of your dreams. You may have loved the Caps and the Orioles, but Buckhannon & Wesleyan had your heart. I am forever grateful to have known you and I hope to be half the woman that you were. I will pass on your lessons to my children and the people I mentor to that your memory will live forever.” Dr. Missy Nixon
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Yesterday, I received this text from one of Allison’s dearest friends and sorority sisters, Janet Chernenko Mears. Janet is undergoing chemotherapy treatments and is unable to travel.
“Allison was one of my closest sorority sister friends. We made her a part of our family. My husband, John and children, Meredith and Cullen loved her too. She was Aunt Al to the kids. She would come to our home in Huntington to stay for the weekend. We invited her to the Greenbrier whenever we were there. I even invited her to my Brooke High School class reunion in 2011. She drive to Wellsburg and for two days became a member of the Class of 1981. She pulled it off like a champ. People were saying, “Wasn’t she in our science class, or Hey she was on the track team, right?” My friends loved her and became her Facebook friends. I introduced her to Ruth Hahn Phelps, who was an equal worshipper of the Ravens and Caps at the Reunion. Allison stayed at Ruth and Ron’s home that weekend. They became and remained dear close friends. We texted a ton but love to talk on the phone frequently for a customary hour or more laughing and chatting. She always answered her phone, “Sister Chernenko, what’s up.? I told her recently of my cancer diagnosis and she wrote me a heartfelt card that I will keep forever. Al had so many friends and touched so many lives. To her parents, brother, and nieces, you should be so proud. Allison was genuine. I loved her dearly and she will never be forgotten.”
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About six weeks ago, Allison made a Facebook post that made many of us really stop and think. This is what she wrote.
“For a long time it seemed to me that life was about to begin—real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time to still be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life. This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So, treasure every moment that you have. And treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time and remember that time waits for no one.
So stop waiting; until you finish school, until you go back to school, until you lose ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter, until you are off welfare, until the first or the fifteenth, until your song comes on, until you’ve had a drink, until you’ve sobered up, until you die, until you’re born again to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy. Happiness is a journey, not a destination.”
Allison your journey brought happiness and joy to so many. From a spunky high school senior to a college student who was serious about books, sports, horses, and fun to an incredibly amazing teacher, mentor, and friend.
“There’s a land of rolling mountains
Where the sky is blue above
And though I may roam, I hurry home
To those friendly hills I love
Where moonlit meadows ring
With the call of whippoorwills
Always you will find me in my home among the hills
And where the sun draws rainbows in the mist
Of waterfalls and mountain rills
My heart will be always in the West Virginia Hills
There, autumn hillsides are bright with scarlet trees
And in the spring, the robin sings
While apple blossoms whisper in the breeze
And there is music in the flashing streams
And joy in fields of daffodils
Laughter through the happy valleys of my home among the hills.”
Allison, your heart touched thousands and your legacy will endure for decades not only in these West Virginia Hills but throughout the world.
Let us pray
Gracious and loving God, we are so grateful for the blessings of life. We thank you for Allison, for her constant encouragement, her joy for living, her genuine kindness, her passion for life, and for the unconditional love she showed for students, colleagues, friends, and family. Give us strength to go forward from this day, trusting where we do not understand, that your love never ends and guide. Inspire all of us the lessons Allison taught us: to spread happiness, integrity, and love throughout our own life journey. Amen.
Bob Skinner ’75, Vice President for Advancement at the Funeral Service for Allison Hull